"Inspiration"

Throughout the past weeks, even months, Andrew and I have made posts on our Facebook walls and we have talked to people in the community about our situation with Riley.  We talked about whatever was going on during that time, whether it was learning about his heart or learning that his heart was no longer beating.  It was at that point, 12 days after the fact, that I started blogging and learning that my blogs were being shared with people I have never met!
We have learned that we have been an "inspiration".  I say that with quotations, because as flattered as we may be, it was never our intention.  I say that with quotations because many of the people who have said that to us have actually been an inspiration to us!  We are weak and immature in our faith more than we are strong and mature.  We both grew up in Christian homes and went to church. We have always been believers. We have followed more closely at different points of our lives.  We can honestly say that since our relationship began back in April 2010, we have slowly been growing with God as the center, and it was not until just before we found out that we were pregnant with Riley that we decided to join Wellspring and be re-baptized together and REALLY follow and walk with God.  We still have a lot to learn!  For me, I need to be better at studying and memorizing scripture as well as praying out loud (in front of others).  I also need to give up completely to God what I tend to give for the moment and then take back and worry over the next moment!
We are learning that with each story someone shares with us about how we have inspired them, it helps us to be more at peace living on Earth without our son.  We miss Riley every day and that will NEVER change, but when we learn that someone spoke to their dad after 20 years, or went to church again for the first time in 3 years, or has finally received peace after years of grieving over their stillborn child, well, that speaks volumes!  It shows us what our Riley's life meant to so many people even though he never met them.  It makes us very proud parents.  For that WE are eternally grateful, for that WE are inspired!
At Riley's memorial service, we invited anyone up front to speak who wanted to give a testimonial about how Riley's life made an impact into their own.  Andrew and I both know that there are people who wanted to speak then but did not want to get up in front of everyone.  We have also learned that there are people who want to share with us now, but are even struggling with what to say.
If you have been "inspired" by us and by our son Riley, please do not hesitate to call us, to write us, to send an anonymous letter if you would prefer.  Each story has been like a band-aid over my heart. It has been medicine for my soul, and I thank you!  We also want to pray for you, for continued peace and comfort in your life that God can provide.  We want to pray for your continued strength because each day can and will be a struggle.
If you are reading my blogs and do not know Andrew or myself, but want to share a story more privately than commenting on my blog, or if you do know us but want to share privately, please send your story to 2055 Wall Street in Spring Hill, TN 37174.
Thank you for reading my blogs, for opening your heart and ears to our story, and for hopefully opening your heart to Jesus! God bless you all!

Riley's Urn surrounded by gifts from loved ones